For some this is a day they loathe. For others it's a day they eagerly await for all year. For me, it is neither. February 14th is just another day, a Tuesday this year. Maybe I'll treat me and my momma to toonie Tuesday at KFC, maybe not. This Valentine's Day took an unexpected turn when my mom came in my room and proclaimed "you must have a secret admirer." I genuinely responded with laughter as she handed me a single red rose, and a box of Godiva chocolates. I knew immediately that is was my brother James that was behind it.
Let me give you a little back story about my brother James y'all. He is not at all my biological brother for starters. He is someone I've known for years now, that I served alongside for 1 summer at a Christian camp. He is also married to an amazing woman, that I know and have the utmost respect for. James is 2 years older than me (If I'm not mistaken). The summer we worked together, we weren't exactly the best of friends, but by the end of the summer we had developed a meaningful friendship. He is my brother in Christ, but also quite literally in every sense of the word.
When I think of the past 6 months, I've noticed a shift in James' presence in my life. James has been an intentional friend/brother. He remembers things that people have said in passing. He has been very consistent in planning group events. In November he actually hosted a party for a few of the single/unwed women in his life, with the sole intention of honouring them, and encouraging them. He had planned an escape room event, that I unfortunately couldn't make it to because I was at work - and he surprised me at work with my favourite salt & pepper chicken wings! That's the kind a man he has grown to be. So today when my mother barged in my room believing I had some strange admirer roaming around Scarborough - I couldn't help but feel blown away by the lengths my brother would go to honour us. When I say "us", I do indeed mean a group of us. I can think of countless ways he has gone out of his way for the fly gyals, and many others.
I'm at a stage in my life where I've had to reevaluate the titles I've loosely given many undeserving people in my life. I remember crying on the phone with my boyfriend, wondering if I had any actual brothers that would honour me as a sister. And I'm pleased to know that the Lord reminded me of three, and James is most definitely one of them.
So to you James A,
My brother from another mother, I say thank you. Thank you for the brotherly love you show me even when I am undeserving. Thank you for including me in plans, even though my work schedule is unpredictable. Thank you for your kindness, and your consideration. Thank you for showing us all that this commercialized holiday is not just about romantic love. Thank you for honouring me at all times. I love you, I appreciate you, and I hope to always have you in my corner.
Your sister,
Nakita
Now you know what they say, behind every great man is a great woman! So I want to take a moment to honour James' equally amazing and sacrificial wife Nana!
So to you Nana,
Thank you a hundred times over! You are such an inspiration to me and many others. Thank you for not changing too much once you got married! You and James are some of my favourite married people to be around. Thank you for being nurturing and a spiritual mother to many. Thank you for writing "For Black Girls". Thank you for being great, and showing other black women that they too can be great. Thank you for speaking on your blackness, and embracing it! It's been pivotal in my growth as a young black woman. Thank you for the role you've played in your husband honouring the women around him. You guys as a unit, encourage me and remind me that God can be clearly glorified through the union he created. And finally thank you for believing in my writing, and for thinking I'm stylish. Believe me when I say, it's the little things I'll never forget.
Love,
Nakita
So for any of you that wanted more information about Nana's book "For
Black girls" check out her website!!
Www.forblackgirlz.com
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